Friday, April 2, 2010
How to spend a spring day.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
News that has no use.
Maybe I am being naive here, but isn't loud music the hallmark of Ice Cream truck?
This next story struck me mostly because of the brutal language involved."Ha!" "What?"
Oh, the horror! Someone, quickly get those children a bowl of chips and put them back in front of the video games where they belong!!! We can't have children playing OUTSIDE!
Did they really need to turn him in to the resource officer? Was he made to sit in the Principal's office....in a teeny tiny chair? These are just some of the things that I think about when I hear these disturbing stories.
For me, driving into someone else is always the best means to conflict resolution.
As much as I was concerned for the welfare of this poor fellow lost in the trees, it occurred to me that 'East Iowa street' is in town, and being that we live in Iowa, there are not vast expanses of forest abounding. Curiosity got the better of me and I located the area in question.................
A few trees between the railroad tracks and the road. In defense of the poor man lost in the trees, the time stamp on this report was 1:38 in the morning and Del's bar was just a few short blocks away.
It's a good thing that there is not a lot of identifying information in that report about the lost keys, we wouldn't want just anyone to be able to walk in and say, "Has there been a set of keys turned in with a NY ring, two keys and a mini flashlight?"
What? Juveniles using foul language? This is exactly the kind of thing that we have a police force for!
Hide the women and children! Five motorcyclists can only mean one thing-there are five people on motorcycles. People on motorcycles=bad!
Ummm, OK......cat problem solved then.
This guy has more trouble than a motorcycle gang riding into town.
This was perhaps my favorite. I PROMISE you, my friends, I don't make this stuff up. If you think that here in the Midwest we don't have celebrity encounters on a regular basis, this just goes to show you how wrong you are. Not only do we have celebrities, but they come here to wreak havoc on poor, unsuspecting, law-abiding citizens.
We are on to you, Cindy Crawford!
If you are a glutton for punishment, click here to read previous news posts.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Mama mia that's a lotta chickens!
Glen and Linda at Sand Hill are nice enough to accommodate small orders for those of us that are able to pick the little peepers up at their hatchery-it is only about 10 miles from my house. Small orders require some patience though. The hatchery does their best to fill small orders in between their regular shipping orders, and all breeds are not necessarily available at the same time, so you need to be flexible. This morning Linda called me to let me know that some of my chicks were ready. My Blue-Laced-Red and Golden Laced Wyandottes were there waiting for me!
I filled up the 'baby pool' -no water, just bedding...I'm not THAT crazy! I filled the feeder with chick starter and mixed up some sugar water to get the babies off to a good start once they got home. Then off I went to retrieve my new charges.
When I got to the hatchery, Linda greeted my with my peeping box of friends. She handed me my invoice and let me know that my 5 Blue-Laced-Reds were in the box and that Glen hatched some extra Golden-Laced so he gave me 7 instead of the 5 that I ordered........really, I only ordered 5 of each, I promise, but OK great, I can use 7. It's called Chicken Math. I have gotten accustomed to Glen adding a couple of extra chicks to the order; Sand Hill doesn't kill any of their extra chicks like most hatcheries do, they would rather send them home with someone.... someone that has s.u.c.k.e.r. tattooed on her forehead. As I was walking away with the box-o-chicks, Linda said, "Oh, he added a few 'filler' chicks too to help them stay warm on your way home." OK, I am pretty sure that Glen is aware of the aforementioned fact that I live 10 miles away since I get chicks from them a couple times a year, and that I do have heat in the truck...I believe I've been Chicken Mathed.
I asked Linda what breeds the 'extras' were. Linda replied, "Could be anything, maybe some egg-layers... maybe something for the stew-pot." Stew-pot? Have you MET me? Clearly nothing raised on my farm is destined for the stew-pot! I thanked her and happily drove away with my little box-o-chicks.
As I drove down the road, the box was peeping quite loudly. I opened the lid and put my hand inside so that the chicks could gather under the warmth of my hand. Boy, I thought to myself, that looks like a lot of chicks....hmmm. I glanced at the chicks and then down at the invoice-5 Blue-Laced-Red, 7 Golden -Laced....I flipped the invoice over-12 filler chicks........12 filler chicks...12...wait, what? OMG. That can't be right. Well, long story short...I looked at the invoice when I got home, I counted each chick as I dipped their beaks in the sugar water, and it was right, there were a total of 24 chicks. 24. Twenty-four. Chicken Math.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Extreme makeover-nekked sheep edition.
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